I’m always getting in my own way. I’m sure everyone does at times but I make it an art form. I can’t help myself. I can’t. I want to figure this out, and I want to be happy but I swear I sabotage everything that gets in the way of me being happy. Maybe this is why I identify with Minnesota sports teams so well. The Timberwolves last night were ready to beat a team that is 21-13… But they lost in the final seconds by one point. The Timberwolves have now lost 7 games in a row when trying to get their record over .500. And 0-10 in games decided by 4 points or less. Classic close but no cigar. Just can’t quite get there.
And that’s how I feel. I’m supposed to be happy. This is supposed to be my year! But something is holding me back. Maybe I’m still overanalyzing everything or maybe I’m just not good at this. It’s really tough going from what I was to who I am now. I am at home by myself basically all the time. I haven’t even had a car to leave right now! So I just sit here. And think. I want to shut my brain off but I can’t so I think. And think. And think. And when you think that much you overthink EVERYTHING. And then get in your own way.
Anyone have any ideas for a hobby I can pick up?